Sledgy missing!
by shinigami sakura2000
Summary: Hunter has a problem. Someone's done the unthinkable and stolen his sledgehammer. Will he find who stole it? Or will he be forced to...*gasp* start using a new weapon?
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I don't know where this came from. I was just thinking about what would happen if Hunter's sledgehammer was stolen and this idea popped in my head. I hope everyone enjoys it.

Disclaimer: I don't own any person, place or thing in this fic. I'm still working on that petition to change that.Summary: Hunter has a problem. Someone's done the unthinkable and stolen his sledgehammer. Will he find who stole it? Or will he be forced to...*gasp* start using a new weapon?

* * *

Shawn was confused. He hated having that feeling, but was the only was he could be described as he watched his fellow degenerate tear up their hotel room like he was a madman. Clothes were all over the place and the beds had been completely demolished. Shawn had to duck as a hanger flew right past his head and hit the door, "Uhh...Hunter what are you doing?"

Hunter just ignored him. He really couldn't believe this. He didn't think this day would ever come. Shawn stared at him blankly as he continued to search the hotel room inch by inch until finally, the cerebral assassin had to accept what had happened. He fell back on his bed, head in his hands as he said to himself, "Someone has actually stolen my sledgehammer."

Shawn looked at him and chuckled, "Is that what you're so worked up about? You probably left it at the arena somewhere."

Hunter grinned and and ran out the door, tossing Shawn over his shoulder as he went out. "One of your rare great ideas buddy!" He said as the two ran out of the hotel. "But if I don't find it at the arena. There will be hell to pay."

As they ran through the lobby Taker and John just happened to see them pass by. "Looks like Shawn and Hunter are up to something again."

"Do you think we should go find out what's going on?" John asked.

"No." Taker sighed. "It's probably something stupid anyway. We'll probably find out what's going on when Hunter comes back and starts asking for our help again."

John nodded and went back to reading his magazine, "Yeah. Might as well enjoy the peace while it lasts."

Taker nodded, "Now you're catching on kid."

Hunter tossed Shawn into the passenger seat before getting in the car. "I really don't see what the problem is Hunter. You could always use one of the extra sledgehammers that they keep in the equipment room." Shawn said.

Hunter glared at him, "How dare you even suggest that I replace sledgy! You shouldn't even be able to put those words in a sentence around me!"

"Hunter relax. I only said that in case we don't find your hammer by the time your match starts tonight."

Hunter calmed down. "Oh. Well you still should never say that sentence around me again. I'll have to add that to the list of things I never want you to do around me."

Shawn pouted at this, "You have a list of things that you never want me to do around you?"

Hunter nodded as they pulled into the back of the arena, "Yeah. I started it after our elimination chamber match in '02. When you scared me for life with those brown trunks. It's good therapy." He looked over and saw the pout on his face. "Oh come on Shawny. I didn't mean it in a bad way. Look after we get sledgy I'll take you to get some ice cream ok?"

Shawn's face brightened even though he was now determined to find this list, "Yay! Ice cream! You're still mean, but at the moment you're forgiven."

The two walked into the arena and went into the locker room. They found Jeff's hidden supply of skittles, Chris' hair gel, one of Rey's spare masks, and Randy's instant tan spray, but no sledgy. "Alright Hunter. It's obviously not in here, so where did you last have it?"

Hunter thought it over, "Ok I had that meeting with Shane yesterday. I could have left it in his office."

"Great! Let's check there next!" Shawn said excitedly. After tearing up Shane's office and any other room they could get to they ran back outside before security could catch them. "I told you breaking the security cams to see if someone put sledgy in there wasn't a good idea!"

"Shawn shut up and keep running!" Hunter shouted back.

* * *

They finally decided that sledgy was no where to be found. "See Shawn! I told you someone must have taken it!" Hunter shouted. He started pacing around the parking lot, "But now the question is who? There are so many suspects and so little time." Slowly a grin broke out on Hunter's face. "I have an idea. We have to go back to the hotel. It's time to round up some suspects!"

"Hunter could you please tell us...Why the hell you forced us all here?!" the group of angry superstars trapped in their hotel room yelled.

In the few minutes since they came back from the arena. Hunter had rounded up Taker, John, both Hardys, Legacy, and the Miz and Morrison. "Now I'm sure all of you are wondering why you're here."

"Did you not just hear us here say why the hell did you bring us here?" Randy asked.

Hunter ignored him and continued to pace, "A crime has been committed today. A very evil and heinous crime. I have decided that one of you...has stolen my sledgehammer!"

"Are you kidding me?! Is that why you kidnapped us and brought here? For a lousy hammer?!" Ted shouted angrily.

Hunter saw red. Nobody called sledgy lousy. He grabbed Ted by the shirt and lifted him from the ground. "You dare call sledgy lousy?! I'll have you know he's kicked your ass many times recently!"

Randy nodded and chuckled, "That is very, very true."

Hunter turned and glared at Randy as well, "He's kicked yours too." Randy shut up and returned Hunter's glare.

"Ok so what makes you think on of us have it?" John asked.

Hunter grinned and dropped Ted to the floor, "All of you have motive and the opportunity. Before we leave somebody will confess!"

Randy snorted, "As if."

Hunter rounded on him, "Randy! You and your little group of wannabes were with me when I last saw sledgy at the arena last night. This means you must have done it!"

"Can I be the one to point out you don't even know where you lost the thing." Randy said.

"Shut up Orton! The last time I had sledgy was after my match against you last night. I put him in my locker room and took a shower before a I left."

"You mean you actually didn't take sledgy home with you like usual?" Morrison asked in amazement.

Hunter sighed sadly, "No, because somebody who shall remain nameless..." He looked over at Shawn who had a sheepish look on her face before continuing, "Was rushing me because the only ice cream parlor in town was closing in ten minutes. After the time he left to go get something to eat and forgot about me, I was not giving him the keys again."

"I told you I was sorry a million times!" Shawn sighed and tried to be the sane one for once. "Come on Hunter. You don't know that they were the ones who did it."

"Yeah Hunter." Cody started, "Sledgehammers are so outdated now. The steel chair is what's making a comeback now."

Hunter tried to charge at Cody and barely held back by Shawn, "I was one of the last people to leave last night. What possible reason could you have to stay at the arena so late?!Randy had finally had enough of the obviously insane game, "Fine! You wanna know what were were doing, so badly?! Hunter nodded and Randy began speaking again. He sighed before he began talking. "All right this is what happened..."

* * *

I know this chapter was short, but I didn't want to give too much away in the beginning. Who do you think stole sledgy?


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own any person, place or thing in this fic. I'm still working on that petition to change that.

Flashbacks- /_italics_/

Summary: Hunter has a problem. Someone's done the unthinkable and stolen his sledgehammer. Will he find who stole it? Or will he be forced to...*gasp* start using a new weapon?

* * *

All eyes were on Randy and the rest of legacy as he began trying to prove that he didn't take Hunter's hammer, but he hadn't said a word yet. Hunter began to get impatient. "Randy why are you hesitating? Could it be because...YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO HIDE!"

Randy glared at him, "For the last time I have nothing to hide! Why the hell would I want that thing anyway? It's possessed or somethin!"

Everybody else with the exception of Cody and Ted stared at him before they began laughing hysterically. "What do you mean sledgy is possessed?" Taker said between chuckles.

Randy sighed. "It was about three weeks ago. That's when we actually did try and steal sledgy."

"I KNEW IT! You bunch of thieves! What did you do with him?!" Hunter shouted.

"Hunter, he said they tried to steal him three weeks ago." Shawn said calmly. "You've had him since then."

"That's not the point!"

"Well if you would let me finish I could get to the point!"

"Fine." Hunter grumbled.

"All right. Now as I was saying, we tried to steal sledgy three weeks ago, but after we got him a bunch of weird things started happening to us..."

_Randy limped slowly back into the locker room after another grueling match with Hunter. "Damn it! What is it with him and that stupid sledgehammer. He gets way to __swing happy with that thing."_

"_You're just stating the obvious Randy." Cody said as he sat down on a bench. "I think I still have the bruises from when he hit me with it in that steel cage match before Wrestlemania. It's like that thing is permanently attached to him or something!"_

"_At least you didn't walk in on him giving it a pep talk before the match like I did." Ted shuddered as he recalled the memory. "For a week, I kept twitching every time I saw him."_

"_So that's what happened! I was really wondering why you were twitching all the time. I thought you were on some kind of lemon diet."_

"_Oh shut up! I'm as tired as you are of having that hammer kick my ass every week, so we really should do something about it."_

"_Like what?" Randy asked._

"_It's simple. We steal it." Cody answered._

"_You've gone completely nuts, haven't you?" Ted exclaimed. "Do you know how closely he watches that thing? We would never be able to touch it!"_

_Randy smirked."That's where you're wrong my friend. You forget he can't be with it all the time and there's three of us and only one of him."_

"...So that's when we came up with the plan to steal you hammer during your next match." He explained. "We made sure that you wouldn't have to use it during a match, so you wouldn't notice it was missing."

"You do know this story has nothing to do with why you were at the arena so late last night, right?" Jeff pointed out.

"I'm getting there! Just keep your moth shut Hardy!"

Jeff pouted and shrunk back and Matt glared at him, "Don't talk to my brother like that jackass!"

Randy stood up and leaned into Matt until their noses were almost touching. "And what are you gonna do about it?"

Matt didn't answer, but he did slap Randy hard across the face. Of course Randy returned the slap with a punch, and the punch became a tackle, and the tackle became an all out street fight.

Cody just sighed as he watched the two fight on the floor, "I guess I'll be the one continuing the story. Well the next night we heard Shawn talking to you right before your match..."

"_Hunter! Come on already. Your match is getting ready to start." Shawn said impatiently._

_Hunter looked up from where he was putting his hammer back into his bag. "I don't see why I can't use sledgy tonight. Vince has been having me use him in all my matches the past few weeks."_

_Shawn shrugged, "I noticed. I guess he wanted to switch it up tonight." He glanced down down at his watch and grabbed Hunter by the arm. "Look the stage managers are gonna kill me if I don't get you out there on time."_

_Hunter stumbled back and winced when he heard sledgy hit the ground. "Damn it Shawn! Take it easy."_

"_Later! I hear your music starting." Cody grinned as he saw the two degenerates run past him and he knew this was his chance. He waited until he was sure the hall was clear and snuck into the dressing room. He saw his prize lying on the ground and grabbed it. "Now why did I think a SWAT team would suddenly appear when I picked this up?" _

_As soon as he said that he was suddenly knocked forward as a ball hit him in the back of the head. "What the hell?!" He quickly turned around and saw an empty doorway. "I thought closed that door when I came in here." He picked up the ball and went back out to the hallway. It was still empty. "Something is very very wrong here."_

_Ted sat in Legacy's dressing room as he waited calmly for Cody to return. When the door suddenly burst open and Cody ran in, sledgehammer in hand. "What's the matter with you?"_

_Cody quickly locked the door and rested against it for to make sure it would stay closed. "There's something wrong with this thing!" he panted as he shook the hammer at his teammate. "Every since I stole this, I've been getting hit in the head with a bunch of strange objects. _

_Ted stared at him in disbelief. "What? You're kidding me right."_

_Cody shook his head, causing some lettuce to fall out. "First it was some soccer balls, then somebody's boots, a couple of microphones, and some food, and the bad thing about it is, every time I look around...THE HALL WAS COMPLETELY EMPTY!" _

"_So you're trying to tell me there's a ghost after you?" _

"_No! I'm trying to say Hunter's hammer is possessed!"_

_Ted chuckled and grabbed sledgy from Cody, "See there's nothing strange about this hammer. I think some of the guys were just playing tricks on you. Just take it easy." The whole time he'd been talking to Cody he had been subtly scratching his arm. The scratching then moved to his shoulders, then to his back. Cody noticed this and stared at him questioningly._

"_What's wrong with you? You're scratching like you've just rolled around in a pile of itching powder or something."_

"_I don't know! I just can't stop itching. It's driving me insane!" By now, Ted was scratching all over. His legs, his back, and even his face weren't off limits to the irritating itch._

"_Drop the hammer! Maybe that will get it to stop." Ted did as he was told and threw sledgy to ground. He instantly stopped jumping around, but he was still scratching. "It didn't stop?"_

"_It's not as bad as it was before, so I think I can deal with it."_

"_What are we gonna do about that?" Cody said as he pointed to sledgy._

"_Just leave it. We'll let Randy deal with it when he comes back."_

"After that we just left sledgy on the ground and waited for Randy's match to end, but we couldn't help but wonder what would happen to him once he picked that thing up." Cody explained.

"So let me get this straight." John began. "Are you trying to tell us that Hunter's sledgehammer, which we've all been hit with countless times, is cursed?"

Before Cody could answer Ted interrupted, "We prefer possessed. We don't believe in curses."

John tried to hold back the chuckles, but it just didn't work for him. Morrison looked at him and shook his head. "You really shouldn't laugh Cena. I've talked to to some of the other guys and they've said strange things happen around sledgy too."

"Why is this the first of I've heard of this?" Hunter wondered aloud.

"Why would something happen to you and your sledgy's owner?" Shawn asked.

"Look we're getting off topic here." Hunter said.. "Ted finish the story."

"Well" Ted began. "After Randy came back from his match, he wanted to know why we still had sledgy in the locker room with us since we were supposed to get rid of it. We tried to explain what happened, but he wouldn't listen to us..."

"_What is wrong with you two? Can't you guys understand simple directions?!" Randy shouted._

"_Look Randy, you really don't know what we went through to get it in here. If you want it gone so badly, then you get rid of it!" Cody shouted back angrily._

"_Fine!" Randy grabbed sledgy and began walking out of the locker room when he heard purring coming from outside. He opened the door and stared at the ground where there was a small black cat. "What the hell is this doing here?"_

"_See it's starting already!" Ted shouted from inside the room._

"_Shut up!" When Randy looked back in front of him there was two black cats in front of him. He looked up and down the hallway and saw some of the guys and some the stage managers. "What is going on here?"_

_The other members of Legacy came up behind him. "We told you that thing was possessed, but you didn't want to believe us and now you have black cats following you. Do you know how many years of bad luck you'll have yet?" Cody said._

"_There has to be some kind of logical explanation for this." Randy looked in front of him again and now saw there were four black cats just sitting there and purring. "And even though I don't know what it is yet, there has to be one!"_

"_Maybe we should just give sledgy back to Hunter. I really think that's they only way all of this will stop." Ted looked down at the cats which had now grown to six. "Unless you like having a group of cats following you."_

"_Fine." Randy growled out. "We'll give Hunter his stupid hammer back."_

_The show was already over, so most of the superstars were back at the hotel. The ride back was interesting, to say the least. Randy's car was being pelted with garbage, and by the time they arrived at the hotel Ted was covered in calamine lotion and there was a trail of cats following them that was at least six feet behind them._

_When they walked in all the legacy members received strange looks from their coworkers, but one glare from Randy silenced them, at least until they heard all the purring that was coming from behind him. Then the looks became laughs. "Okay, now what room is Hunter in?" _

_Cody looked at the slip of paper the he got from the lady at the desk. "319. I hope this works. I'm sick of having things thrown at me."_

"_How do you think I feel?! I haven't been able to stop scratching since we left the arena. Now it seems just being near that thing makes me itch!"_

"_Both of you shut up!" Randy knocked on Hunter's door and waited for him to answer. Of course things just can't go easy for him and Shawn answered the door._

"_Randy? What are you doing here?" He asked. He looked over the three superstars standing outside the room and was instantly confused. "What happened to you guys?"_

"_Just go get Hunter." He ordered._

_Shawn shrugged. "Fine Fine. You're so grouchy." Instead of going back into the room Shawn just turned around and shouted. "Hunter! Randy's out here with a bunch of black cats for you!"_

_Hunter came groggily to the door. "Is it really necessary for you to yell Shawn?" He glanced over at Randy who just shoved sledgy back in his arms and started walking away._

"_Don't ever bring that thing near me again!" He shouted back._

_The two remaining legacy members stared at the game nervously. "You left it at the arena and we just wanted to bring it back." Ted explained._

"_Now since we did, we have to go now. You know we have to go feed all those cats, so later!" Cody pulled Ted away and began following Randy back down the hall._

"_What the hell was that about?" Shawn asked._

"_I don't think I want to know Shawny. I am glad they brought sledgy back though. Let's go get some sleep. I really don't want to think about Randy's strangeness tonight."_

"And that's why we never ever would try to steal sledgy again." Ted finished. "We just got back to normal about a week ago."

"That really was a great story guys, but you still didn't answer my question. Why were you staying at the arena so late?!" Hunter shouted. He wanted his hammer back and he didn't seem any closer to finding it that he was this morning.

"Well after the show ended we saw John go into your dressing room and come out with the bag you keep sledgy in. We told Randy and we were waiting for him to come out of the arena so we could warn him when you saw us." Cody explained.

Hunter immediately rounded on the chain gang commander, "So it was you Cena! What do you have to say for yourself?"

"That I didn't do it." He answered simply.

"Don't get smart with me! So what's your story that I probably won't believe since we have witnesses that put you at the scene!"

"First of all, your witnesses just said your hammer was possessed. You're gonna believe that over me?" John asked incredulously.

"He does have a point Hunter." Taker said.

Hunter sighed. "All right I'll listen to him, but John at least have your story take place last night instead of three weeks ago. I think I lost a couple a brain cells just listening to Legacy's story."

* * *

Even though legacy's been ruled out. There are still more suspects with very interesting motives for wanting sledgy. What possible reason could John have to take sledgy?


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own any person, place or thing in this fic. I'm still working on that petition to change that.

Flashbacks- /_italics_/

Summary: Hunter has a problem. Someone's done the unthinkable and stolen his sledgehammer. Will he find who stole it? Or will he be forced to...*gasp* start using a new weapon?

* * *

All eyes were on Cena as they waited for him to explain why he was seen carrying sledgy out of Hunter's locker room. "Well I'm waiting! What's your story John. Why did you steal my hammer!" Hunter shouted angrily.

"I didn't steal it and before you say it, I don't have it now either!"

"Oh really?"

"Yes really! When Ted and Cody saw me, I was "borrowing" your hammer." He said and air quoted.

Hunter stared at him disbelievingly, "What could you possibly have to borrow sledgy for? You don't even use sledgehammers in the ring!"

"Exactly, but you do. When I overheard Legacy talking about all the weird things happening to them because they took your hammer. I had to think about the next time I had a match against you, which was tonight."

"I thought you didn't believe us." Cody said smugly.

"I still don't, but when I saw the whole thing with the cats that night I wasn't taking any chances."

"Look Cena, I'm losing what's left of my patience, so if you don't mind, what the hell did you do with sledgy?!"

John shrugged, "I took him to be uncursed."

"Uncursed?!" Randy echoed. He paused and thought that over. "Damn it guys! Why didn't we think of that?"

"How did you even know you could do that?" Shawn asked.

"I'm glad you asked that question Shawn, and the answer is actually very interesting."

Adam snorted, "Oh great. Here we go again."

John glared at him, "Now It was at the beginning of the show. You and were going over your match with Randy in Legacy's locker room and Shawn, you were talking with Taker about feuding after Wrestlemania. Since both of you were out, you left your locker room open. Which made my job a whole lot easier..."

_John looked around the hall before slipping silently into Hunter's locker room, instantly spotting the black hammer shaped_ _case that the game's symbol on it. He picked it up and looked around as if he was expecting something. "I guess the SWAT team must be on lunch break."_

_He grabbed the replacement case he brought with him and set it on the chair. "Hunter doesn't usually check on sledgy until right before his matches, so I should have plenty of time to bring this thing back unnoticed._

_As John backed out of the room, he ran into a wall. A wall that was warm, tall, and most surprising, breathing. He spun around and came face to face with Taker. "Damn it man! You scared the hell out of me. What took you so long?"_

"_I had to find some way to distract Shawn so he wouldn't come back over here. He wouldn't stop following me." He explained._

"_You didn't do anything to him, did you?"_

"_No, I left him in catering with a three month supply of ice cream." He glance down at his watch. "He should be finished in ten minutes. Give or take a few seconds."_

"_Great job!" John handed sledgy to Taker. "I don't want anything weird to happen to me, and I know any kind of curse on this thing couldn't possibly have any kind of effect on you."_

"_You're really weired out by this aren't you?"_

"_Extremely. That's why I came to you deadman. I love animals and everything, but I don't want to end up like Randy. Imagine sharing a room with him and being kept awake __by the constant purring of cats. It drove me crazy! I don't even want to get started on what happened with Ted and Cody."_

_Taker nodded and walked into his dressing room, "I see your point. Well kid, let's see what we can do. I wasn't the leader of the ministry of darkness for no reason." _

_John froze when he saw the eerie puffs of black smoke sneaking out from under the door, "Maybe I should just wait out here. You probably work better by yourself anyway. You already have sledgy, soo... I'll just be going." When John turned to leave a strong hand grabbed him and pulled him into the room, the door locking behind him._

"_Look! You brought this thing to me and I'm not gonna do anything to it unless you're here too, understand?" John nodded vigorously. "Good. Now let's get started."_

"Wait a minute. You mean to tell me, you were so freaked out about what happened to legacy, you took my sledgy to have it uncursed by Taker?"

"Yeah! You have it exactly right."

Hunter turned in shock to the phenom and ran over to him, shaking the bigger man. "Why?! Taker how could you do this to me! I've never used sledgy on you before. How could you harm him like that?"

Taker stopped Hunter's shaking by wrapping a hand around his neck, "Now are you calm Hunter?" He nodded and was dropped to the ground. "I helped him because I heard the rumors too, and since I had a match with Shawn later on tonight, I wanted to make sure that curse couldn't be passed from person to person."

Morrison chuckled, "Come on Taker. Do you really expect us to believe you're afraid of a curse? You're the deadman. You should be making curses."

Taker sent him a glare that sent shivers down his spine, "I know that, but whatever the hell is on that sledgehammer is nothing ordinary. I mean there is something really wrong with that thing!"

"You mean something weird happened to you too?" Randy asked.

"Well...not immediately."

_John looked around the room nervously. He didn't know why people got so paranoid when they came into his locker room. It was completely normal, expect for the eerie music, the black candle, and the strange fog of black smoke that covered the whole floor. "So Taker, what exactly are you going to do?"_

_He dropped sledgy to the floor and grabbed a bottle of water, a cross, and Shawn's bible. "Haven't you ever seen the Exorcist before? It's common sense. The hammer is possessed so we must exorcise it!'_

"_Are you sure you can do this deadman? I mean don't we need a priest or something."_

"_Do you know anybody crazy enough to do an exorcism on a sledgehammer?" John shook his head. "Didn't think so. Now stop being scared and sprinkle this on sledgy when I tell you too. He thrust the bottle of water into John's hands._

"_Is this real holy water?"_

"_Well...no. I tried to get some, but when the priest saw me he held his cross in front of him and slammed the door in my face, and people say I'm weird."  
_

"_When did you go?"_

"_Last night after the show. I left straight after my match, but I guess I should have waited until the storm ended because I got completely soaked."_

_John chuckled, "Figures. Now let's get this started. We don't have much time left before Hunter comes back looking for sledgy!"_

"Hmm. So that's where my bible went. I've been looking all over for it." Shawn said.

Randy was rolling around on the bed clutching his sides in laughter, "You guys have got to be kidding! This is weirder than what happened to me!"

John subtly raised his leg and kicked Randy off the bed, "Shut up! I didn't want to end up like you and your sidekicks, so I had to do something. Besides, the exorcism was Taker's idea and it almost got me killed!"

"Do you realize this has nothing to do with what happened to sledgy! Why can't you people understand that!" Hunter shouted angrily.

"Relax already! That little piece of information comes at the end of the story." John explained.

"Well let's get to the end of this thing!"

"Fine." John sighed. "Well the moment I dropped some of the water on sledgy that's when all hell broke loose.'

_John was banging on the door frantically, trying to escape the growing cloud of black smoke that was filling up the room. "Taker what did you put on that thing?!"_

_The deadman was currently swinging a phone book back and forth like a fan to disperse the cloud, but it wasn't working out to well. "Me?! You did it! This is only happened after you drenched the thing in the water. I said sprinkle it John not drop the whole fucking bottle on it! Why isn't that door opening?! _

"_I don't know! It's like it's locked from the outside or something and it won't budge!"_

_Taker's fanning did nothing but make the smoke cloud larger and smoke had now drifted up to their necks. "If we get out of this alive, remind me to Tombstone Hunter a few times. That should be payment enough for this."_

"_Worry about that later. Come help me break this damn door open!"John covered his mouth to keep from breathing in the smoke and used his free hand to keep banging on the door. "Somebody has to hear us! The show isn't over yet!"_

_Taker pulled John away from the door and got ready to ram it. "Banging on the door isn't working. With our weight we should be able to break it down." _

"_We got a problem with that plan deadman."_

_Taker sighed irritably, "What is it now Cena?"_

"_How the hell can we ram the door if we don't know where the hell it is!"_

"_Well that does pose a problem." Taker looked through the smoke thoughtfully. "I pulled you straight back from the door, so if we run straight ahead we should hit the door. Ready?"_

_John nodded, "Ready."_

_Rey, Punk, and Dave were walking past the room when they heard what sounded like an explosion. Rey stared at the wall for a minute before adjusting his contacts. "Those walls did just shake right? Tell me I wasn't the only one who saw that."_

_When they heard the sound again Punk answered, "What the hell is going on in there?" _

_Rey shrugged, "Who knows." He walked over to the door and tried to turn the handle. "Hey guys give me a hand with this. I think it's jammed or something." Punk and Dave grabbed on to the luchador and began to pull him back._

_John rubbed his head gently, "Taker I can't do this anymore. I think I cracked my forehead the last time."_

"_Look John, We can't stay in this smoke much longer or we'll die. We have to get out of here now! Let's try this one more time!" Taker got in position. "One..."_

_John followed his lead, "Two..."_

"_Three!" Rey shouted._

_As Taker and John charged toward the door Punk, Rey, and Dave managed to open the door, leading the deadman and the chain gang commander to run right out of the room and right into another wall with a trail of black smoke following behind them._

_John hit the ground and cradled his head, "Owww! Damn it! That really hurt!" He turned to face the confused superstars. "Oh. Hey guys."_

_Taker stared at them, "Is there something you three wanted?"_

Dave gave them the once over, "What the hell happened to you two? Did you guys lose a fight with a lawn mower?"

"_What are you..." John trailed off when he looked down at his clothes. His shirt was virtually gone and his pants were reduced to nothing but shreds. "What the hell did that smoke do to us?!"_

_Taker wasn't much better off. His hat had a huge hole in it and was currently around his neck. His bots had disappeared up to the ankle and his usual floor length leather coat was now waist length. He glared at John before stomping back into his room and throwing the bag that had sledgy in it at John. _

"_Take this and get away from me! I never want to see that damn thing again!" He glared at him one last time before going back into his room and slammed the door._

_Punk stared at him and chuckled, "What did you do to piss him off like that?"_

"_You don't even want to know. By the way...Have any of you guys seen Hunter anywhere?" He asked innocently._

"_I think he and Shawn are in catering or something, why?" Rey said._

_John smiled at him before taking off down the hall, "It's nothing really. I just...have to go talk to him about something. I'll see you guys later."_

"...When you guys saw me coming out of Hunter's dressing room I was carrying the empty bag I had placed there until I came back with sledgy." John explained.

"As much as I hate to say it." Hunter began between laughs. "Your story actually made enough sense for me to clear you as a suspect." He sighed. "Well did you at least see anyone near sledgy after you left."

"No. Sorry man. I didn't see anyone, but since I'm done I can't please leave now? There's too much craziness in one room for me." John said as he stood up.

"No! No one is leaving out of this room until I get my hammer back!"

"I think I might be able to help with that." Taker said. "After I came out of my dressing room again. I heard Jeff saying that he was working on a new sculpture and your hammer would look perfect with it."

All eyes turned to the Hardy Boyz and they were instantly surrounded with a very irritated and pissed off Game standing in front of them. Matt and Jeff looked at them, then each other, and finally at Hunter before pointing to each other. "He did it."


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own any person, place or thing in this fic. I'm still working on that petition to change that.

Flashbacks- /_italics_/

Summary: Hunter has a problem. Someone's done the unthinkable and stolen his sledgehammer. Will he find who stole it? Or will he be forced to...*gasp* start using a new weapon?

* * *

Jeff glared evilly at his brother, "I did it? What the hell do you mean by I did it?!"

"I could ask you the same thing! You were the one that wanted the hammer. I had nothing to do with it!" Matt exclaimed.

"Stop lying!" Jeff shouted as he pushed Matt onto the floor. "You were the one who told me my sculpture needed something and then you told me to go steal Hunter's hammer because that would be the best thing for it!"

Matt got up and pushed Jeff back, "I've seen the way you've been looking at sledgy these last couple of weeks. You've just been itching to get your hands on him and now you're trying to blame me for what you did!"

"For what I did?!" Jeff was now so into Matt's face they were nose to nose. "You were the one that volunteered to get sledgy for me because you said that if I tried to get it Hunter would have caught me before I even got to his dressing room door!"

"Ha!" Matt grinned. "So you admit it!"

Jeff growled, "Admit this!" And with that he tackled his older brother to the ground with a barrage of punches and kicks. The remaining superstars stared at the two brothers in amusement as they watched them rolling around on the floor beating the hell out of each other.

Finally Hunter became fed up with the brothers and shouted, "Will you two quit it already?! You two can kill each other on your own time, but right now you two need to give me a good reason not to strangle you for kidnapping sledgy!"

Matt froze mid hair pull and looked up at Hunter angrily, "How many times do I have to tell you?! Jeff did it! I'm innocent!"

A kick to the groin shut Matt up as Jeff rolled away to the other side of the room. "Some brother you are, laying the blame on your little brother like that. You've stooped to a new low Matty."

Hunter started to growl, his hands making swinging motions like he was still holding sledgy. Everyone took notice of this and took a few steps back. Shawn laughed nervously. "Guys, I really think you should tell your story before Hunter goes completely insane."

Jeff pouted and glared over at Matt, "Fine! Only because I don't want to be hit with whatever Hunter uses as a replacement for sledgy." He cleared his throat. "Now last night was the end of my six month suspension of working on my art backstage. After I tried to make a full body replica of Dave and he ended up encased in plaster one night, Vince said I couldn't bring anymore of my projects backstage, so last night I was working on my new sculpture when John ran into our dressing room..."

"_So Matt, What do you think of this color?" Jeff held up a bowl of extremely bright red paint. "I want to make sure this statue will stand out._

_Matt kept reading his magazine, "Jeff any color is fine. You do your best work when its random. Besides what...?!" The sound of a door slamming made Jeff jump and anything else he was going to say was cut off with the realization that he was now covered in his brother's paint._

_John leaned against the door, out of breath and clutching a bag to his chest. "Damn that was a close one! Hunter almost got me."_

_Matt spluttered as he tried to shake off the paint, "John! What the hell are you doing in here? And why are you carrying sledgy's case?"_

_He looked around and suddenly noticed that he wasn't alone in the room. He gave Matt the once over and nodded. "Red is a good color on you man, maybe you should start wrestling like that. It really works for you."_

"_Shut up Cena and answer my question."_

"_I'm afraid I can't do that oh guru of mattitude." John opened the door again and made sure the coast was clear. "But if Hunter or Shawn comes by here, you haven't seen me since this morning." He slipped out the door. "Also if Rey, Punk, or Dave come by here tell them that we weren't doing an exorcism on Hunter's hammer." This time he took off running. "Later!"_

_Matt just shook his head, "We work with some of the strangest people, don't we Jeff?" He paused when his brother didn't answer. "Jeff?" When he turned he saw Jeff staring back at him with a bucket of water and a pout on his face. "What's the matter with you?"_

_Jeff continued to pout. "John made me waste all of my paint that I spent so much time mixing up today. Since all of it fell on you and it's dry now, I figured if I dumped this water on you I could finish painting my statue!"_

_The elder Hardy brother started inching toward the showers. "Maybe you should paint it later." he said nervously. "Right now you should think about what you could add on to your sculpture." A sudden though crossed Matt's mind. "Why don't you grab Hunter's hammer. I'm sure he won't mind once he sees what you'll do with it!"_

_Jeff eyes lit up at the suggestion. He'd always wanted to use sledgy in some of his work but Hunter would never let him do it. "Really?! You think he would?"_

_Matt grinned. "I'm sure of it! You can use can use sledgy for the head of your statue, and I bet if you leave right now you'll be able to get it before he comes back for it for his match."_

"_Great idea!" Jeff hugged Matt tightly before bouncing out the door. A few seconds later he bounced back and stuck his head through the door. "John's right. You really should start wrestling like that." His only answer was Matt throwing the empty paint bucket at his head._

"_This is why there needs to be a nationwide ban on skittles. I would not be soaked in paint right now if my dumbass brother wasn't on his fifth sugar high of the day!" Matt continued to grumble as he walked to the showers. "At least telling him to go get sledgy should occupy him for a while and I can finally get some good R and R!"_

"See!" Jeff shouted. "I told you it was Matt's idea to steal sledgy! I was just an innocent pawn in his diabolical and evil plan to get me to leave him alone." Everyone looked at him quizzically. "What?"

"Jeff, when did you learn to use words like pawn and diabolical?" Morrison asked.

The younger Hardy just rolled his eyes. "Just because I spend the majority of my time figuring out how to take over the skittles company and then use their power to take over the world, doesn't mean I don't know how to expand my vocabulary."

"Let me guess, your TV broke and all you could get was educational television?"

Jeff nodded, "Basically. I learned those two words in the first five minutes and fell asleep. TV had never made me yawn so much before."

Matt snorted from his place on the ground. "Fine! I may have been the one that brought it up, but he was the one who actually went to steal it. After everything I've heard about sledgy, do you really think I would try to take it? That would take someone crazy. Someone like...Jeff!" He said as he pointed to his brother.

"You're such a traitor Matty! Maybe the evil Matt storyline had some truth in it after all. Maybe you are looking for a way to get rid of me. That's the only possible reason for you to send me after sledgy!" he shouted hysterically.

"Jeff," Matt said calmly. "You just admitted to trying to figure out a way to take over the world with skittles. If there is a crazy one here its definitely you."

Before Jeff could answer, Taker interrupted, "Jimmy legs does have a point. Well what do you have to say for yourself?"

"All right." Matt said as he got up from the floor. "This is what really happened. After Jeff took off to go steal sledgy, I sat in our dressing room for a while and waited for him to come back. I didn't think he would actually go and try it, but this was Jeff and he had consumed sugar, so I had knew I had to go catch him..."

_Matt looked up from his magazine for the fiftieth time, expecting see Jeff come bouncing through the door. "Damn it! I can't believe he actually went to steal sledgy. I always knew one day he would come up with an idea that would get him pedigreed. " He went over to the door and looked through it cautiously. Luckily for him, there was no sign of anyone in the hall. He sighed. "I can't believe I'm about to do this."_

_He tiptoed down the hall, moving as quietly as he could to DX's locker room. It was only a few doors down, but having to look over his shoulder every five seconds really slowed him down. Matt made sure no one was coming again before quickly running inside and slamming the door behind him. "Jeff you idiot! Don't you ever try..." _

"_Don't ever try what?" _

_Matt turned around slowly and saw the one person he was trying to avoid. "H-Hunter! What are you doing in here?"_

"_It is my dressing room, or did you not see the green spray paint on the door?"_

"_I-I saw it." he stuttered back."Umm...have you seen Jeff anywhere? He finally convinced me to play a game with him and he disappeared. I thought I saw him run this way."_

_Hunter looked around the room, "Well as you can see there is obviously no one in here _

_but me, so if you don't mind." Hunter said as he started pushing Matt toward the door. "I have to get ready for my match...AND YOU'RE INTERUPTING ME!" He tried to slam the door behind Matt, but he slipped back in the room. Hunter just shook his head, "I'm already tagging with one of the most hyper people in the WWE, can't I just get a five minute break?"_

_Matt just looked back at him disbelievingly, "My brother is **THE** most hyper person in the WWE and you don't see me complaining do you?"_

"_So the shouting you were doing earlier wasn't complaining?" _

_Matt was about to answer when he saw a set feet just barely sticking out of one of the half closed lockers in the room, "Shawn did stop hiding in the lockers to try and scare you right?"_

_Hunter started to turn around, "No. Now he only does it around Halloween now. Why?"_

_Matt jumped in front of him so he wouldn't see Jeff, "N-no reason." He tried to put on his best innocent face. "So can I stay in here in case Jeff comes back?"_

"_NO! Besides why would he come in here?"_

"_He's Jeff. Who knows why he does half the things he does?  
_

_Hunter nodded thoughtfully. "You do have a point Hardy." He sighed and walked out the door, "Fine. You can stay, but only because I don't want Jeff to wreck the room. Shawn almost killed me the last time he was in here."_

_As soon as the door closed Matt let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. "Jeff! Get your rainbow haired behind out of that locker right now!"_

_Pouting, Jeff stepped out of the locker with sledgy in his hands. "You didn't have to yell Matty."_

"_I'm not even close to yelling yet. Now put sledgy down before Hunter or Shawn..." Matt trailed off as he looked up at his brother. "Oh my god! Jeff what the hell happened to your hair?!"_

_Jeff looked at him confusedly, "What do you mean? There's nothing wrong with my hair."_

_Matt took hold of Jeff's arm and led him over to a mirror, "I'm telling you now, brace yourself."_

"_What are you talking about? I look completely..."NORMAL!" When he looked into the mirror he released a scream of pure terror which shattered the mirror, caused Hunter's water bottles to explode, and dented a steel chair. His normally rainbow colored hair was now completely back to its natural blonde, it was like he had never dyed his hair a day in his life. Even his roots were completely blonde._

_Matt looked around at the destruction and chuckled, "Now that's what I call talent."_

_Jeff turned on brother and slapped him in the head. "This is no time for jokes! My completely awesome hair has been made one solid color! What am I gonna do?"I can't go out looking like this!"_

_Matt tried to pacify his brother. "Easy there Jeffro. We can always re-dye your hair. It's not that big of a deal."_

"_I guess your right. It's only my hair." He shivered. "Why is it so cold in here? I know Hunter likes cold water but this is ridiculous...Matt why do you keep staring at me like that? Does my hair really look that bad?"_

_Matt shook his head vigorously. "Jeff, I'm really thinking that we should just leave sledgy and get out of here." _

"_I don't care if Hunter's hammer is cursed or not. I'm using it for my statue!"_

"_Well then bro, you might want to take a look in the mirror again."_

_Jeff looked back at the mirror and screamed again. "What the hell is happening to me?!"_

_This time, his arm bands were completely white and didn't have any holes in them and his face paint was nonexistent. He quickly found out that the reason he was so cold was that his regular ring attire had been replaced by a black t-shirt, some plain black trunks, but he still had his regular boots. Basically, he looked like a blonde version of CM Punk._

"_Why?!" He screamed, shaking the hammer into the air. "What did I do to deserve this!"_

Matt stopped telling the story when he heard Jeff sniffle, "Come on bro. You know it wasn't that bad. You're back to normal now anyway."

"That's not the point!" Jeff cried. "You just don't understand! It wasn't the fact that my hair lost its color, or that my completely kick ass sense of style had disappeared. It's the fact I couldn't eat any skittles! I had...I had lost complete interest in them!" At this he broke down sobbing, and a chorus of gasps echoed throughout the room.

"I really don't believe it." Randy said in awe. "I never knew anything that could pull Jeff away from skittles."

"Out of all the stories I've heard today, this one definitely has to be the weirdest. Hunter said, trying to drown out Jeff's sobs. "Now can we please get to why I shouldn't believe you two still have sledgy?"

"All right. Well I couldn't convince him to leave sledgy behind so I figured we take him with us and then I would bring him back later. That's when things just got worse..."

"_Jeff! Why don't you just get rid of that thing? Don't you see what its doing to you!"_

_Jeff just shook his head as he finished setting sledgy on his statue. "I told you I would take a few pictures of sledgy with my statue before I have it back to Hunter. Just give me a couple of minutes." He put the finishing touches on his sculpture before stepping back to admire it. "There! I think this is my greatest piece yet, and to celebrate..."_

_He picked up the special bowl of skittles he kept for whenever he finished a project and started to reach his hand in, but it kept freezing._

_Matt sighed irritably, "What are you doing Jeff? Go ahead and celebrate so we can get rid of that hammer."_

_Jeff set the bowl down so he could use his other hand to force its way in. "I don't know what's wrong. It's like my body is refusing to let me have any skittles! My mind and body don't want to do what I say. Matt help me!"_

_Matt thought it over. He had a choice between putting and end to his brother's main source of sugar or helping him get his skittle fix. He kept thinking and realized that if he didn't help him. Jeff wouldn't stop whining until he did. "Let me try." He grabbed a handful of skittles and tried to feed them to Jeff, but it was like a force field was surrounding his mouth. "What's going on?!"_

"_I don't know! I need my skittles Matty! I can't live without them. What am I going to do for food?!" _

"_It's that damn hammer Jeff! Go give it back to Hunter now!"_

"_Let me get my pictures first!" Jeff grabbed his camera, but as soon as he pressed the button to take the picture his camera suddenly exploded. "What the hell?!" He dropped the camera and began to stomp on it to put out the fire. "I've never seen a camera explode like that before...cool!" _

_It seemed the like explosion of his camera made Jeff completely forget about what was happening. Of course since they were brothers, Matt was completely used to this. Cool? Cool! This is a sign Jeff! You usually listen to signs!"_

"_So what is this a sign of?"_

"_That this hammer is gonna kill us if you don't give it back to Hunter!"_

"_Oh please." Jeff waved off his brother. "What's the worst that could possibly happen?" As soon as he said that he smelt smoke. When he turned around, he saw that his newly completed statue had also burst into flames. "Oh shit!" He grabbed the fire extinguisher Shawn had bought him after he made him a flaming model of Texas for his birthday that nearly caught the arena on fire. "I've been working on that thing for months!"_

"_See!" Matt finally lost it and grabbed Jeff by the throat and began shaking him. "Are you gonna listen to me now?! GIVE THAT DAMN HAMMER BACK TO HUNTER BEFORE WE END UP BURNED TO A CRISP!"_

"_There's only...one...problem with... that." Jeff choked out._

"_What?!"_

"_Sledgy is attached to my statue."_

_Matt whipped his head around to the still burning statue and could faintly see the outline of the sledgehammer. "Oh damn it!" He raced around the room looking for anything to put out the fire. He grabbed a bucket of ice that still had a few bottles of water in it and threw it into the fire, but all that did was make the fire flare up. "This isn't good." He glanced over at Jeff. "Get off your ass and help me!"_

_Jeff was still staring in the flames hypnotically and wasn't listening. "I'll help you in a second Matt." Of course when he was hit in the head with his empty paint bucket he had no choice but to get up. "That hurt!"_

"_I'll show something that hurts if you don't help me put out this fire!" Matt shouted as he tried to smother the flames with the towel he found. Since he was trying to save sledgy, the elder Hardy ignored the constant tapping on his shoulder. Well at least until the towel he was hitting the flames with, went up in smoke too. He turned to his brother, "What the hell do you want Jeff?!"_

_Jeff held out the small fire extinguisher he found. "The flames might go out a lot faster if you use this, but before you put them out, can I sketch them first?" He asked innocently._

_Matt just stared it him before turning back to the fire and putting it out with the extinguisher. He panted as he saw the remains of Jeff's once six foot statue, which was nothing but ash. "I don't believe this." he said as he dropped back on to the couch. "What are we gonna tell Hunter?" He dropped his head into his hands and sighed. "We are so dead."_

_Once again there was another irritating poking at his shoulder. "What is it now Jeff?""_

"_Can I sketch sledgy before we have to give him back? I lost all of my other work, so I would like to have something to show for it."_

"_Jeff what are you talking about? Sledgy is completely...! What the hell are you doing with that?!" In his hands, Jeff held the completely unchared sledgy. It even looked a little more cleaner than it did before the fire._

"_I dug it out of the ashes, so can I sketch it?"_

_Matt's eyebrow twitched and silently grabbed sledgy from Jeff and started dragging him down the hall. He calmly stopped in front of the green spray painted door and went inside. He dropped sledgy back in his case and started dragging Jeff back to their dressing room. "As soon as the show is over, I'm flushing your skittles and telling Vince to ban you from bringing any of your art work backstage."_

"...Which is exactly what I did after I brought him back. If you really think that after what happened I would leave him alone to try that again. You must really be out of your mind Hunter."

"So did you learn anything after you kidnapped Hunter's hammer?" Shawn asked.

Jeff raised his hand and nodded, "I learned that using a towel to smother fire only works when you completely cover the fire. I also learned that the number one method of cleaning a sledgehammer is to surround it with things that will catch on fire, let it burn, and then clean the ashes from it."

Hunter nodded. "So that's why sledgy was so nice and clean when I got him for that match last night. Thanks a lot Hardy. At least your story did help me in some way. By the way, while all of this was going on you didn't see or hear anyone mention sledgy did you?"

Matt thought about it for a moment. "Actually I did. When I was dragging Jeff back to flush his skittles, I heard Miz telling Morrison about how they wanted revenge for how you humiliated them a few months ago on Raw. He said the way to cement their status as the number one tag team of the twenty first century would be taking something from the greatest tag team of the twentieth century.

Jeff was still glaring Matt while he talked to Hunter. "I only wanted to use sledgy for my work. You didn't have to flush my skittles because of it!"

"Shut up Jeff! At least I told the truth and didn't try to pin something on my brother!"

"What?! You said the whole thing was my idea!"

"It was your idea!"

While the Hardys continued to continued to argue, he turned to the Miz and Morrison. "Now! You two are the only suspects left! This means you had to have taken sledgy. You tell me where he is and I won't make your punishment too harsh!" Hunter said evilly.

The two A-listers looked at each other and laughed. They took one glance and Hunter and started to laugh even harder. All this did was piss Hunter off even more. "Just what the hell is so funny, you two?!"

They suddenly stopped laughing and turned to Hunter. Then in all seriousness both of them said, "We have no use for sledgehammers at the Palace of Wisdom."


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Ok I'm working on the faster updates. Now let's see what the The Shaman of Sexy and the Chick Magnet have to say. I hope everyone enjoys this!

Disclaimer: I don't own any person, place, or thing mentioned in this story. I do want to own Shawn and I'm still working on a petition to make that happen.Summary: Hunter has a problem. Someone's done the unthinkable and stolen his sledgehammer. Will he find who stole it? Or will he be forced to...*gasp* start using a new weapon?

* * *

If Hunter wasn't so angry he would have laughed at the absurdity of that statement. Of course, just because Hunter was angry it didn't mean that everybody else couldn't laugh, which is exactly what they did. The room erupted in laughter, even the Hardyz had stopped arguing long enough to join in.

"So you're trying to tell us that you didn't take sledgy because you don't use hammers in the palace of wisdom?" Shawn asked between giggles.

John nodded and said confusedly, "Why would we bring something so primitive into a place of enlightenment?"

Hearing him say that broke through Hunter's anger and he collapsed in a fit of laughter. "I know you guys were the ones that came up with it, but you do know that the palace of wisdom doesn't really exist?"

Both Miz and Morrison looked at each other before looking at Hunter and slapping him, "Blasphemy! How dare you say that!"

Shawn managed to hold Hunter back before he tried to kill the two A-listers for the slap."Look, just because we never bothered to tell you guys where the palace is, doesn't mean it doesn't exist." Miz explained.

"Alright Alright, so tell us where is it then?" Hunter asked.

John and Miz pulled a folded sheet of paper out of their pockets. They unfolded both and put the two halves together, forming a picture of big ass mansion that looked like it was in the Hollywood hills. It was about three stories high, had pool with a waterfall, and the lawn was cut so that clear images of their faces could be seen, but that was only outside. Who knew what was inside!

All jaws dropped and the room grew completely silent when the picture was shown. "Y- you guys are kidding right? That's just a picture of a house isn't it?" Cena asked nervously.

John imitated a drum roll while Miz shouted, "PRESENTING...THE PALCE OF WISDOM! Three floors of floor to ceiling mirrors, so we can look at how awesome we are. Six workout rooms because let's face it, it takes a lot of work before before you can look in the mirror and see two specimens of greatness like we do. We also have--"

"Will you two shut up?! Even though I am actually in shock that your place of enlightenment actually exists. The important matter at the moment is to find my damn hammer!"

"Well don't look at us. We're victims here too!" Miz exclaimed.

"How exactly are you two victims?!" Hunter demanded.

John pointed to the picture, "This is what the palace of wisdom looked like...BEFORE IT BURNT UP IN A MYSTERIOUS FIRE LAST NIGHT!"

"And it's all because of that stupid sledgehammer!" The Miz was seething as he thought about what happened to the palace. "Someone planted that thing in our locker room and it caused us nothing but pain!"

"So you mean somebody actually tried to frame you guys?" Randy asked disbelievingly. "Who would want to waste their time doing that?"

"Yeah guys, just admit it, you two took the hammer then a bunch a weird shit started happening. We've all owned up to taking sledgy at some point. Well, except for the Hardys anyway." Cena said.

"You guys are starting to look mighty suspicious." Taker said thoughtfully. "You told everyone about how you were gonna get DX back after they humiliated you at Raw's 800th episode, and then sledgy just happens to appear in your locker room with no explanation whatsoever, I'm not buying it."

"Everyone else has had a chance to explain themselves but us. You guys just can't stand it because we're winners and you're losers. This is injustice!" John replied.

Hunter glared at them evilly. "Fine. You two are the only ones left without an alibi, so go on and tell your story, so I can say you're guilty, get sledgy back, beat the hell out of the two of you for taking him, and move on with my life."

John started first, "Bout time you decided to listen to us." He turned to his audience. "Pay attention everyone because this will clear our names and tell us who to sue for damages to the palace of wisdom. Now, obviously because what was going on with that thing Hunter calls a weapon, Raw was a little bit more wild than it usually is. Of course since I am the Guru of Greatness, I really didn't care at that moment. When we heard the commotion with Jeff and Matt, Miz and I stepped out to see what was happening..."

_John glared at his tag team partner straddling his waist."Damn it Miz! You've been doing this for a couple of months now. Why can't you get it right?!"_

"_Excuse me? I'm not the one who wants his abs bejeweled for all of his matches. It seems like a waste of time to me. What are you trying to do? Blind our opponents?" Miz got off his waist and put the bag of jewels and the tweezers he was using back on the table. "If you want it done so badly do it yourself!"_

_John stood up and went over to the mirror to have his daily ab admiring time, frowning when he saw that a couple of jewels were placed crookedly. "If I want it done right, I'll have to do it."_

"_While we're in here focusing on your abs, we should be thinking about how we're gonna get DX back for that little stunt they pulled on us."_

_John chuckled, "Are you really still thinking about that? I told you I had a plan. Don't worry about it."_

"_So let's here it then. What is this amazing plan you've come up with?"_

"_All great tag teams have something that makes them memorable. It might take me a while to figure out what that is with DX, but once I do, we'll steal it and cement our status as the best tag team of the 20th and 21st century."_

_Miz just stared at him and shook his head. "I really worry about you sometimes. Are you sure the glue from those jewels isn't affecting your brain?"_

_Morrison spun around to face his partner and said, "You know what Miz? I--!" The sound of shouting from outside cut off John's rant and drew the attention of the two A-listers and they went out in the hall to go see what it was. _

_They saw Matt covered his soot and ash, dragging Jeff back to their locker room. "As soon as the show is over, I'm flushing your skittles and telling Vince to ban you from bringing any of your art work backstage." They watched for a few more minutes and had to laugh when Jeff bit him and tried to escape. They ducked back into their room and had a good laugh at the Hardyz expense._

"_I wonder what Jeff did to have Matt flush this stash of skittles?" Miz said._

"_Who knows? When Jeff gets sugar, there's always something crazy waiting to happen. That's why Vince started to uninstall all the vending machines in the arena's we have shows in." He flopped down on the couch only to jump back up again, rubbing his ass gently. "What the hell did I just sit on?!"_

_Miz raised his eyebrows and the object now sitting on their couch. He grabbed it and held it up to show John. "This is Hunter's. I think he keeps his sledgehammer in here. I always see him carrying this thing around with with him."_

"_I wonder how it got in here?" John said quizzically, taking the hammer from Miz. "I don't remember going to go steal anything from Hunter yet."_

"_John I really don't think that's something we should steal from him. We'd have an easier time trying to kidnap Shawn. Besides, I heard some of the guys saying some pretty weird things about that hammer." He warned._

_John shrugged, "Don't tell me you buy into all that crap." he looked over at the clock and stuck sledgy in his bag. "Listen, it's almost time for our match. We'll decide what to do about it when we come back."_

"_Alright, but if something happens during our match don't say I didn't warn you."_

"_Whatever. Let's just get this match over with so we can come up with a plan to get some ransom before we return the hammer."_

"So you're telling us in the few minutes you were in the hall watching me drag Jeff around, someone else took sledgy out of Hunter's locker room and planted him yours?" Matt asked.

John nodded, "Basically."

"Forget all that! I just wanted to know what kind of weird shit happened to you guys!" Randy shouted. "For the rest of us, the effects seemed to kick in instantly. Why didn't that happen to you?"

"Well it actually did, but unluckily for us, it happened during our match. You see...let's just say we had a little wardrobe malfunction." John continued.

Shawn suddenly glared at Hunter and punched him in the back. "Is that why you covered my eyes during their match and wouldn't let go until they were off screen?!"

"Duh Shawn. Like I was seriously gonna expose you to that. You would have been scarred for life. No amount of therapy could have ever helped you."

"Oh." Shawn leaned down and gave Hunter at big hug. "Thank you! I don't know what I would do without you being here to help preserve my brain!"

Hunter grinned, "What are friends for Shawn."

"And they say we have a bromance." Miz said sarcastically. "Can I go on and continue with the story now?"

"Sure go ahead."

"Now since I want to spare John and myself the embarassment of what happened to us the ring, I'm gonna skip that part and tell you what happened after we came back..."

_The door to their locker room busted open as the greatest tag team of the 21st century struggled to inside the best they could while being wrapped awkwardly in John's long, furry coat._

"_I guess the crowd got a lot more then they bargained for tonight, don't ya think John?"  
_

_John turned to his partner and gave him his best death glare. Well as best as he would while his face still looked like a tomato. "At least you had boxers on under your gear. I was completely exposed! Pictures of my ass will be on the internet faster than legacy can go through a bottle of baby oil!"_

"_One member or all three?"_

_All Miz was met with was a growl as John kicked the door closed. "I really can't believe this. It should not be possible for someone's clothes to just come apart at the seams! Rey and Dave could have done something to help us, but all they did was laugh! And to top it all of they wouldn't even stop the match."_

"_I'm not the one wanted to wear pants that are so tight they look like a second skin! It's not like there's nothing we can do about now. Maybe the guys in the production truck could do something to fix it?"  
_

_When John looked in his bag to grab a pair of jeans, he realized there was something missing. Something very very important that could possibly have been the cause of their little problem in the ring._

"_Miz did you take sledgy?"_

"_No. You stuck him in your bag before we left for our match. Why?"_

"_Ummm...it's missing." he whispered._

"_It can't be. We locked the door when we left and we didn't tell anybody we had it. It's not like it grew legs and walked away!"_

"_Hey as long as it's out of our hands, we shouldn't worry about it." John grabbed his bag and started to head for the door. "Our match is over so we can get out of here. Let's grab some food and get back to the hotel."_

"_Why aren't you spazzed out anymore about the pictures taken of you tonight?"_

"_That's easy. I have this philosophy that if you witness greatness, you want to become that greatness and people seeing that footage of our match with understand why I'm called the Shaman of Sexy. Now let's go."_

"_Once again my friend, I seriously worry about you."_

_When they went out to the parking lot. Everything seemed completely normal. Except for the fact a bunch of weird noises were coming were coming from their rental. When Miz opened the trunk of the jeep, he screamed and fell back on his ass, shaking his finger and pointing back inside._

"_J- John! L- Look inside!"_

_John hesitantly walked to over to the trunk and jumped back at least three feet. In the center of the trunk Sledgy's case sat, just sitting there mocking them. Unfortunately, that wasn't the worst part. The strange sound was coming from the 30 balls of fur that were jumping up and down in the back seat. _

"_There's a bunch of chicks hopping all over the car! How could these have possibly gotten in here?"_

_Miz scrambled off the ground and went around to the drivers side, "I don't know, but this our only way back to the hotel, so what do you want to do?"_

"_I want to forget we ever found that thing in the first place but..." He trailed off and then started laughing hysterically. "Miz you gotta see this!"_

_When he came back around he saw John holding one of the chicks. "Watch." He placed the chick on the ground and as soon as it started to move away it was like some kind of magnetized force picked it up and put it back in the trunk. "No matter how crazy all of this is, you have to admit that's pretty cool."_

_Miz picked up another chick and the same thing happened to it. "Ok you're right. That is awesome." He dropped his bag in the trunk and got in the car. "Let's get back to the hotel before anything else weird happens."_

_John nodded, "That's the first good idea you've had all day."_

_The ride to the hotel went smoothly, if you call the constant chirping and jumping of the chicks smooth. When Miz stepped out of the jeep, he was faced with a whole new problem. He had really became a chick magnet._

"_John! These fucking chicks won't stop sticking to me! I can't go into the hotel like this."_

_John struggled to keep his laughs in, but seeing his tag partner looking like a bright yellow fur ball. He really couldn't resist. "Well maybe Christian's inside. He calls his fans peeps, we could give them to him."_

"_Now is not the time for jokes John. These stupid things are pecking a hole in my head!"_

"_Take it easy. They'll probably fall off as soon as we get inside." He turned back to the trunk. "What do you want to do about sledgy?"_

_Miz rubbed his temples, the parts he could get to anyway. "Let's leave it in the trunk. We can give it back to Hunter tomorrow. The less we're in contact with that thing the better."_

"_True. Now let's go find Christian. I'm sure we could make a lot of money selling him those chicks."_

_After they found Christian and used another larger magnet to demagnetize the chicks away from Miz. The two A-listers finally made it to their hotel room, ready to get what little rest and relaxation they could._

"_Hey Miz, hit the TV will ya?" John said as he dropped on the the bed._

_Miz coughed up some feathers and hit the power button on the remote. The TV flashed on and a news station came up that was showing images of a fire burning in California. "Hey John check this out."_

_They stared intently at the TV as the reporter began speaking, "Breaking News! A sudden unexpected fire has began in the Hollywood Hills. My sources say that about a half hour ago, what used to be a three story mansion that was owned by John Morrison and Mike "The Miz" Mizanin, two WWE superstars, burst into flames. Luckily because it's in a secluded location, firefighters say that this house is the only one that will sustain any type of damage. The bad news is because this location is surrounded by trees, it will also take firefighters some time put subdue this blaze."_

_The sound of the remote dropping to the floor was the only sound in the room. John and Miz turned to each other with looks of horror deep on their faces. Their mouths moved as if they were trying to say something, but no words would come out. Finally after a couple a minutes and a few gasping breaths both of them let out a blood curdling scream._

"_HOLY SHIT! THE PALACE OF WISDOM IS ON FIRE! WE DON'T HAVE A PLACE TO BE ENLIGHTEND ANYMORE!"_

Miz wiped some tears from his eyes, "When we went back to the car to get sledgy to give to you, it was gone."

"Now do you belive someone framed us? What we went through is ten times worse then losing your stupid hammer!" John cried. "How can we remained enlightened without a place of enlightenment?! It's just not possible I tell you! Just not possible!"

Miz rubbed his back soothingly, "It's alright John. As soon as we find out who planted the hammer we'll make them pay for damages."

Everyone was shocked at their outburst for about five minutes before moving on. "If you guys really were framed, then I'm out of suspects. I'll never get sledgy back!" Hunter said sadly.

"Actually," Jeff said. "We still have one more suspect."

Everyone's heads turned to the rainbow haired Hardy boy. "What are you talking about Jeffro?"

"Well," He stood up and began pacing around the room. "All of us have stories that involved us taking sledgy, but we all returned him before Hunter had his match."

"Yeah and my match was the last one on the card and I know I had the real sledgy with me and I also know I took him back with me to the locker room. I remember having to stay later because Shane needed to go over some things about the next PPV."

"That's right!" Ted exclaimed. "And none of us could have put sledgy in Morrison's car because as Hunter said, he was the last one to leave. He would have noticed something."

"Well since Hunter obviously didn't steal his own hammer, that leaves only one person..." Taker looked over at the innocent looking heartbreak kid, which was a dead giveaway he had done something wrong. "Shawn why did you do it?"

As soon as Taker said that, Miz and Morrison jumped up and glared at Shawn, "You're paying for the repairs to the palace of wisdom!"

Shawn looked appalled. "Me! I'm always with Hunter, you guys know that. I could have never had the opportunity to steal sledgy."

"Since he's Hunter's best friend, nothing remotely strange would happen to him if he touched sledgy, and he _**is**_ the only one of us who has had nothing weird happen to him lately." Cena stated.

"Shawn, you did disappear last night. I know you said you were going to get something to eat, but you were gone a really long time. Where did you go?" Hunter asked.

By now everyone had surrounded Shawn and he had no route of escape. He held his hands up in front him like a shield to keep them from getting any closer. "Come on buddy. Do you really think that anything would make me steal sledgy from you?"

"Do you really want me to answer that Shawn? Just tell me what you did to sledgy. I promise I won't be mad."

"Really?"

Hunter sighed, "Really. So what happened?"

Shawn looked down at the floor shyly, "Umm...well...I kinda pawned him."

Hunter turned back to look at his friend. His anger back at full force. "YOU DID WHAT?!"

* * *

Now that we finally know who stole sledgy. The question here is why. What could have possibly caused Shawn to get so desperate that he had to pawn his best friend's most prize possession?


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Yeah I know I suck with the updates, but I hope everyone enjoys this! Now let's find out what made our favorite heartbreaker commit the insane crime of stealing Hunter's hammer. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I still don't own anybody. Sadly, they all own themselves.Summary: Hunter has a problem. Someone's done the unthinkable and stolen his sledgehammer. Will he find who stole it? Or will he be forced to...*gasp* start using a new weapon?

* * *

Shawn shrunk back from Hunter, now seriously terrified of his friend. "Come on Hunt. You said you wouldn't be mad at me." He pouted and even made his lower lip tremble for added effect. This usually would have gotten Hunter to do anything he wanted, but he was too pissed off to even notice.

"That was before I found out YOU PAWNED MY SLEDGY! What the hell could have possibly made you do that?!"

As soon as he said that, everybody else took their seats in the room, eagerly waiting to hear Shawn's tale of what happened. Hunter may have found his thief, but he was still without a hammer. Somewhere in the back of their minds they felt sorry for their resident heartbreaker, but then again, they had been trapped in a hotel room for a little over five hours because of him, so they decided to ignore it.

"Well I'm waiting buddy." Hunter said, tapping his foot impatiently. "Before you tell your story I'd really like to why you did this."

"Would you believe I was an undercover agent and your sledgehammer was a piece of evidence in a case I'm working on?"

"Nope. Try again Shawny."

"Well...how about Vince threatened to fire me unless I split you up with your hammer?"

"Keep trying." Hunter said.

"Ummm...I needed to pawn him to buy food for my dogs?"

"Shawn! You don't even have any dogs! Just tell me the truth!"

"Fine!" Shawn sighed and looked back up at him, teary eyed. "I'm really sorry Hunter! It was just...I had always...I had never seen a hat that cool before!"

For a few moments the room was completely silent. The ability to speak had suddenly left everyone. "Now let's get this straight..." Hunter started. "You pawned sledgy because you needed money to go buy a new hat?"

Shawn nodded. "I lost my wallet, so I didn't have any of my credit cards or cash. I couldn't ask you because you were still mad about the time I stole your wallet to go buy my other new hats, so when I was taking sledgy to the hotel after your match I got the idea then. I just really wanted that hat and before you put all the blame on me it was half Taker's fault too. He got the craving for ice cream stuck in my head and the hat I wanted had holders for ice cream cones on both sides!"

Hunter just shook his head. "I really wish you would have told me this time Shawn...cause you gave me your wallet the other day, so you wouldn't end up losing it again!"

"Ohhhhh." He scratched his chin thoughtfully. "I do seem to remember something like that happening. That actually makes sense."

Hunter chuckled and soon the chuckling became full blown laughter. When the laughter started to border on hysterical, everyone else backed away until it was just him and Shawn. "Makes sense he says. Can remember something like that happening he says."

While Hunter kept kept muttering to himself, Taker decided to take over. "Shawn you can't blame me for your ice cream problem. Nobody told you to go pawn Hunter's hammer to get an ice cream carrying hat."

"but...but...that's not the point!" Shawn shouted. "That's not even the real reason I pawned his hammer. It was just an added bonus. Besides, if Hunter had told me he had my wallet, none of this would have happened!"

"So why did you do it?" Taker asked.

Before Shawn could answer, Hunter pushed Taker out of the way. "So now know its my fault?!" Shawn's slightly homicidal friend growled. "Look here heartbreaker, I'm gonna give you ten minutes to tell your story, tell me what pawn shop my sledgy's in, and how **you** are gonna get him back. Understand?"

Now Shawn knew he was fighting a losing battle, but the smart ass in him just wouldn't shut up. "And if I don't? With the way you're treating me now, I shouldn't even tell you which pawn shop I put him in!" he shot back.

Instead of shouting, strangling, tying him up, or hitting him with a blunt object, Hunter... began to laugh again. It wasn't by any means an insane laugh. It was a completely normal 'I have no reason to strangle my best friend and everything is good' laugh. It scared the hell out of Shawn.

"If you don't explain yourself, I won't have to do anything to you." He then gestured to the nine extremely pissed off wrestlers standing behind him. "I can't, however, promise that they won't. Don't forget that you're the reason they have been trapped in a hotel room for almost six hours and had to reliever the terrors of dealing with sledgy. I'm sure if I can't come up with something to do you, they will."

As if noticing them for the first time, he waved shyly at them and smiled. "Hey guys." When all he heard was growling and everyone starting to move towards him again, he realized that if Hunter even moved an inch, he was dead meat. "Fine! You said ten minutes right?" Hunter nodded and Shawn sighed, "Well this is what happened..."

_Shawn stood tiredly backstage while he waited for Hunter to come back. He was bored, really bored. Being backstage was never fun when he didn't have his partner in crime with him. His eyes turned to the long case sitting in front of him. "Well since Hunter isn't here, I get to cause trouble with you Sledgy." _

_He grabbed sledgy and immediately began to come up with crazy ideas to use him for. He grinned at the case. "Now Hunter will be back from shooting his promo soon, so sadly I don't have much time to cause trouble with you." The sound of yelling caught Shawn's attention and peeked out of his door._

_As he watched the Hardys fight in the hallway, he noticed that Miz and Morrison's door was wide enough for him to slip in unnoticed. He looked at the case again. "I just found the perfect thing to do with you." He quietly snuck behind John and Miz and dropped sledgy on their couch before hiding in one of the lockers._

_He watched them come back inside and struggled to keep himself from laughing when Morrison sat on sledgy. His respect for the Miz grew in that moment. He was one of the few guys on the roster that wasn't crazy enough to mess with sledgy. Now Morrison on the other hand...wasn't that smart._

"_Whatever. Let's just get this match over with so we can come up with a plan to get some ransom before we return the hammer." John said as he walked out with the Miz._

_Shawn listened to the door close and then stepped out of his hiding place. It had been awhile since he'd had this much fun. He quickly grabbed sledgy out of John's bag and poked his head through the door, making sure the coast was clear. He tiptoed back into their locker room and jumped when he came face to face with Hunter._

"_What are you doing with Sledgy, Shawn?"_

"_Umm...well nothing actually. Since you were busy, I needed something to do, so I was just taking a walk backstage with sledgy."_

_Hunter looked at him and scoffed, "Do you really expect me to believe that?"_

"_Well...yeah if you don't mind."_

"_Shawn" Hunter started, "You know how much trouble he can cause when neither one of us have him."_

"_I know that! Besides I promised I wouldn't cause anymore trouble with sledgy unless you were in on it too."_

"_Alright. I believe you for now. Now give me sledgy so I can go out for my match." Shawn gave the hammer to Hunter. Before leaving he turned back to him and said, "I need you to do me a favor after the show."_

"_What is it?"_

"_Shane needs me to stay and go over somethings about the next PPV and I don't want you to have to stay that late, so could you take our stuff to the hotel when I come back from my match?"_

_Shawn nodded his head vigorously. This meant he had more time to play with sledgy. "Sure. No problem Hunt." He handed the hammer over to Hunter and watched him as he left the room before plopping down on the couch and staring at the clock. "Only ten minutes to go."_

"So that's why you were in such a hurry to get me out! I'm never leaving sledgy with you again!" Hunter shouted.

Shawn pouted, "I keep telling you it wasn't my fault! I was bored. Since you weren't there I didn't have anything to do."

"So you expect me to believe that everything is my fault because you can't keep yourself entertained?"

"Well...yeah!"

Hunter took a deep breath and said calmly, "Shawn just finish the story so I can go get my hammer."

"Fine! Well your match was taking too long, so I decided to wait for you in the hallway. I knew I had to act fast because Miz and Morrison were gonna leave any minute and I had to finish up my plan..."

_Shawn grinned happily when he saw Hunter coming down the hall with sledgy in hand. Eagerly, he ran over to his friend, grabbed sledgy, and kept running past him out into the parking lot. This left a very speechless and confused Hunter standing in a cloud dust that had came up from Shawn's rapid movements._

_Shaking his head, Hunter just kept walking into the locker room, "Sometimes it's better to just not ask with him."_

_Outside, Shawn was looking around, making sure he was the only one outside before running over to Morrison's jeep. He grinned when he went to lift open the trunk and found that it actually opened. "I hope those two never learn to completely close a trunk."_

_As he was placing sledgy in the car, he heard the sound of a door opening and could see the shadows of two people. He slammed the trunk closed and began running to the other side of the lot, he would have to find out what happened to them when he got to the hotel._

_When he finally saw them pull out onto the road, he had to quirk his brow at what he saw. He couldn't make out what they were, but he could see what looked like a bunch of small, yellow hopping cotton balls in the car. He couldn't help himself and burst out laughing, "I love sledgy! I wonder if Hunter would let me keep him with me permanently from now on." As they drove to the hotel, another thought struck him. "How exactly did those things get in there anyway?" After thinking about it for a few more moments he decided he didn't care and kept driving._

_When the three of them finally got back to the hotel, Shawn decided that whether Hunter liked it or not, he was keeping sledgy. Especially, after he got a good look at the Miz when he got out of the jeep. As it turns out, the yellow cotton balls were baby chicks and were completely glued to every inch of him. "Serves him right!" Shawn muttered to himself as he hid behind his car, waiting for them to go inside. "Told him he shouldn't have made fun of me losing my hair."_

"Hold on a minute!" Miz shouted as he stood and pointed an accusing finger at Shawn. "You did all of this to us because I made fun of you for going bald?!"

Instead of answering, Shawn stood up and smacked him. "Why are speaking of this?! I told everyone that we would never speak of that again!"

Cena tried next, "Shawn, he's just sayin is that why you--" before he could finish, Shawn smacked him too.

"What part of never speak of this again don't you people understand?!"

Hunter had enough. He then stood up and whacked Shawn on the back of the head. "Answer the damn question already!"

"Yeah. I put sledgy in your car because you talked about my hair." he muttered while rubbing where Hunter had smacked him.

"Good. Now that we got that out of the way," he stared menacingly at his audience while continuing, "If anyone of you even thinks of interrupting Shawn again before he can finally tell me where sledgy is, as soon as I get him back, I'll happily duct tape him to whoever caused Shawn to stop telling his story, understand?" A muttered chorus of "yes" was heard throughout the group and Hunter turned back to Shawn. "Continue...at a faster pace if possible."

Shawn just glared at his friend, "You're lucky I was getting to the good part. Now I hadn't noticed it when we first got to the hotel that day, but there was a pawn shop across the street from there. When I was taking out of Miz and Morrison's car, the big flashing lights on the sign distracted me and I had to go inside..."

_The flashing lights had entranced him, he had never seen anything that bright before...well he really had but the lights were calling to him and he had no choice but to go over there. Shawn grabbed sledgy and the rest of their bags and walked hypnotically across the street and into the store._

_Inside, the effect of the lights wore off, but he started looking around anyway and that's when he saw..it! The silver cowboy hat was on the head of a mannequin that also had on a feather boa that looked suspiciously like Hogan's, but Shawn decided to think about that later. What really caught his attention was that on both sides of the hat there were these little cone shaped holders, which in Shawn's mind were the perfect size to hold ice cream cones. He had to have it._

_Shawn picked up the hat and took it over to the counter. "Excuse me? How much is this hat?"_

_The lady behind the counter turned and leered at Shawn, showing him a gold toothed smile. The lady looked to be in her fifties, was a bit on the heavy side, and had one of those beehive hairstyles from the 50's. "My name is Bertha. Now how can I help you again?"_

_Shawn backed away a few steps. The way she was staring was starting to scare him. "Ummm...how much is this hat?"_

_Bertha glanced down at it. "Fine choice here sexy. This hat is one of a kind, but for you, I'll consider parting with it for five hundred."_

"_You're gonna charge me five hundred dollars for a hat?!"_

_Bertha nodded, "Yup."_

"_Deal." Shawn dug in his pockets for his wallet and came up empty, then searched his bags and came up empty again. He pouted. "I'm having a bit of a money issue today. Can I come back and pay you tomorrow. I'm staying at the hotel across the street if that's any help."_

_She grabbed the hat and began sticking behind the counter, "Sorry, but I don't take IOU's." She gave Shawn the once over again. "But...I have this stereo over here and I may be willing to compromise if you'd be willing to do a little dance for me."_

_That almost made Shawn bolt out of there right then, but he really didn't want to leave his hat behind, but he didn't have any money. Just as he was about to give up, a thought struck him. "What if I could give you something that is owned by a real WWE superstar?"_

_Bertha gave him a thoughtful look, "What do you have?"_

_Shawn picked up sledgy and muttered, "Forgive me Hunter." He put sledgy on the counter. "This is Triple H's sledgehammer. It has to be worth something."_

_She picked it up and gave it a through inspection. "I still don't believe you. Prove it to me."_

"_I'm Shawn Michaels! HBK, the showstopper, Mr. Wrestlemania, the icon, the main event, the headliner! How else could I get his hammer if I didn't work with him!"_

_She squinted at him and pulled on her glasses, "Well I'll be. You are Shawn Michaels." She shrugged. "Alright. I'll take it." She shoved the hat back over to Shawn and took the hammer. "Enjoy your hat sexy!"_

_This time there was nothing stop him from high tailing it out of the shop. Grabbing his bags, he sprinted back across the street, hearing Bertha's cackling laughter all the way back._

"...So because you couldn't ignore a bunch of flashing lights, you ended pawning my hammer for a hat that has ice cream holders on the sides?"

Shawn nodded, "Yeah. You wanted the story and this was the story. You happy now?"

A slow and obvious evil grin began to spread across Hunter's face. "Do you remember what else I asked you for in those ten minutes?"

"Yeah." Shawn began to count off on his fingers. "You wanted to know where sledgy was, why I pawned it, and how I was gonna get it back...I don't have to take my hat back do I Hunter?"

The game just shook his head, "No. I have a better idea." He grabbed Shawn by the collar and began dragging him out the door. He turned back to the others, "Grab my camera and that CD next to the TV." He looked back at Shawn, "Time to go back and see Bertha, buddy."

Bertha stared at the group in front of her in confusion and shock. "So let me get this straight..." She pointed at Shawn and then at Hunter. "He stole your hammer and pawned it without your knowledge, and because you didn't know where it went, you held all of these other guys hostage until someone would finally come clean?"

Hunter nodded, "Basically, so can I have my hammer back?"

"An item as rare as that? What are you gonna give me for it? I can already tell you its gonna take more than bringing me that hat back for you to get your hammer."

Hunter's evil grin returned in full force. "Instead of bringing the hat back. I'm gonna do you one better." He leaned over to her and said, "What if I could promise you a little striptease from our very own Heartbreak Kid over here."

She grinned, "Now you've got my attention." Shawn looked on nervously as he watched his friend talking with the crazy shopkeeper.

When he finished, he turn back to Jeff who put the CD in the stereo next to him, and Shawn's entrance music began playing loudly throughout the store.

Shawn just turned and gaped at him, "Come on buddy, you can't be serious about this can you? You of all people know I can't dance!"

"I don't really care about that rightn now. She wanted a dance, so you're gonna dance." He smiled and snapped his fingers at him. "Time to work it sexy boy!"

Ten minutes laughter and great deal of laughter later, Hunter walked out with sledgy held tightly in his hands. He glanced at his camera, "At least whenever I get bored , I'll have something to entertain me." He called back to Shawn. "Come on Buddy! We gotta get up early tomorrow."

Shawn poked his head out of the door before hurrying out. As part of the deal, after his little dance, Bertha got to keep his clothes, so all he had to cover himself with was his cowboy hat. "This isn't fair Hunter! You could have at least let me keep my pants!"

Hunter just laughed and kept walking. Taker tapped Shawn on the shoulder. "You really brought this on yourself Michaels, but tell me, did you learn anything from this?"

Shawn thought it over before nodding, "Yeah. I need to learn to stop trying to look innocent whenever I do something, I always seem to get caught that way."

Taker sighed before his face broke out in a grin to rival Hunter's. "Maybe this with give you a little incentive to learn to never steal from one of us!" With that, he grabbed Shawn's hat and tossed it to Cena. "Run Cena! Run!"

Cena took off running with Shawn hot on his tail, but before Shawn could catch him he tossed the hat to Matt. "Guys! Give me my hat damn it!" Shawn shouted as he chased after them, "Come on! I'll never do this again!"

The others just grinned at him before taking off again. "Sorry Shawn." Jeff said as he tried to catch up with his brother. "We probably won't believe you until we get back to the hotel!"

Shawn almost froze in shock as he realized what Jeff had said. "You can't be serious? Guys...?" When no one answered, he began to run to catch up with them. "DAMN IT YOU GUYS!"


End file.
